Kineto Pictures’ Awards for Outstanding Cinema 2009
With the recent news of Jesse James’ infidelities and the unraveling of his marriage to Sandra Bullock, it appears that the Curse of the Best Actress Award is alive and well. In the last ten years, four of the winners were divorced within a year of winning the award. Such was the fate of Kate Winslet, Reese Witheerspoon, Hilary Swank, and Halle Berry. Three more winners broke up with longtime boyfriends. So you can add Charlize Theron, Gwyneth Paltrow and Julia Roberts to the list as well.
It really is a sad story. Sandra Bullock is generally considered one of the nicest women in Hollywood, and that probably factored in to both her nomination and win. The Academy loves a nice, feel-good story, which was just like her movie. The Blindside isn’t a cinematic masterpiece by any measure (the film is already blurring into Remember the Titans and host of other sports melodramas in our collective consciousness), but audiences loved it. And they loved Sandra too. Even though her performance probably wasn’t the “best” performance of 2009, it was arguably “better” than performances by anyone not named Meryl, Helen, Carrie or Gabourey.
Now it doesn’t feel so good though.
The win has been tainted by the curse. And to think that it all could have been avoided. If the Academy has only voted for the Best Actress???
Here at Kineto, we can’t turn back the hands of time. But we can base our votes on the actual performances – not on feel good stories and popularity. In so doing, maybe we can karmically undo some of the effects of the curse?
Cause we like you too Sandra.
So on to the Kineto Awards for Outstanding Cinema . . .
2009 Kineto Awards for Outstanding Cinema
BEST PICTURE – UP
Runner Ups: District 9, The Hurt Locker
Commentary: It was a close race between these three films, but Up edged the other two. One voter commented, “it will be the most remembered and influential to future filmmakers.” Another wrote that “it was classic storytelling . . . the screenplay will be studied for years to come”
BEST COMEDY/MUSICAL/OTHER – ZOMBIELAND
Runner Ups: The Hangover, I Love You, Man
Commentary: Our voters were divided on their opinions of The Hangover and I Love You, Man. However, they all loved Zombieland, which took the genre that Romero created to a whole new level. If you haven’t seen it, be sure to check this horror comedy out!
BEST PICTURE (THAT YOU DIDN’T SEE) – FANSTASTIC MR. FOX
Runner Ups: Pirate Radio, Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs
Commentary: It was truly fantastic (and had to be in order to redeem Wes Anderson from Darjeeling Limited and Life Aquatic). Some voters even felt that it was worthy of a Best Picture nomination. If only it had found an audience.
BEST DOCUMENTARY – THE COVE
Runner Ups: Food, Inc., Good Hair
Commentary: One voter noted that “although The Cove was a documentary, it felt like a well-crafted action/adventure film.” This is no small feat in a non-dramatic format.
BEST ACTOR – JEREMY RENNER/HURT LOCKER
Runner Ups: Sam Rockwell/Moon, Niam Leeson/Taken
Commentary: Renner, a veteran Hollywood actor, finally found the right role to showcase his immense talents to a mass audience. One Kineto voter noted, “Liam Neeson deserves a special nod for bringing the only credibility to such an awful but entertaining (and hugely successful) movie.”
BEST ACTRESS – MERYL STREEP/JULIE & JULIA
Runner Ups: Carey Mulligan/An Education, Helen Mirren/The Last Station
Commentary: Meryl Streep was utterly delightful in Julie & Julia, which would have been an almost unbearable movie without her. It’s a little bit strange that the Academy has only given one nod (out of sixteen nominations) to Ms. Streep, who is arguably the greatest actress of her generation. Kineto got it right the first time.
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR – CHRISTOPH WALTZ/INGLORIOUS BASTERDS
Runner Ups: Woody Harrelson/Zombieland, Christopher Plummer/The Last Station
Commentary: Too bad Kathy Bates wasn’t nominated for Blindside. That guy is awesome!!! But we digress; Waltz was amazing in Tarantino’s best film since Pulp Fiction.
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS – RACHEL WEISZ/BROTHERS BLOOM
Runner Ups: Maggie Grace/Taken, Mo’Nique/Precious
Commentary: Megan Fox and Kristen Stewart take heart. You can be beautiful and a good actress. Rachel Weisz was great in this quirky and under-recognized film.
WORST PICTURE – 2012
Runner Ups: Gentlemen Broncos, Paul Blart: Mall Cop
Commentary: Again it was a close race, but 2012 was EPIC bad. John Cusack survived the movie, but his career may not. Let’s hope that he never publicly laments doing Better Off Dead again. He might be hoping for a sequel.
WORST ACTOR – EVERYONE/GI JOE
Runner Ups: Nicholas Cage/Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call-New Orleans, Robert Pattinson/New Moon
WORST ACTRESS – MEGAN FOX/JENNIFER’S BODY or TRANSFORMER’S (take your pick)
Runner Ups: Amanda Peet/2012, Kristen Stewart/New Moon
Commentary: Some might find it strange that anyone even notices Megan Fox’s performances. Might be a little bit gay.
So those are the Kineto Award for Outstanding Cinema in 2009. You know we are right, but you can disagree if you want. Regardless, we’d love to know your thoughts.